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When we talk about pregnancy, it is the mother to be that often comes into the picture. Dads take it to the background and their doubts and fears go unanswered and unnoticed.
Starting from the moment that they learn about their fatherhood, they feel a plethora of emotions rising within themselves. Even a man who has been waiting for a child for a long time will still question himself and his ability to be a good parent.
If you are a dad to be, you must remember that these fears won't just go away. They might last you for the period of pregnancy and even further into the child's life.
The best thing you can do to deal with these fears is to arm yourself with knowledge. While most of your fears will be irrational, there will be a few that will be truly legitimate and will need to be addressed.
Reading and understanding on these fears will help you to differentiate between the two and ignore the irrational ones and tackle the real ones.
Today, we shall talk about the various fears that a new dad has to deal with. If you are a dad to be, this will help you tremendously. Read on to know more.
Men Are Scared Of The Birthing Process
At the end of the pregnancy, looms the process of delivery. Though most hospitals have the men to hang out in the corridor, there are hospitals that let the spouse into the birthing room to witness the birth of their child.
But both the scenarios can be terrifying for the dad. Either, he has to stand out of the door and just hope that everything is fine with his wife and child or he has to actually see all the screaming, bleeding and the pain.
To deal with this, you can read as much as possible about the birthing process. You can also go to a birthing class along with your wife. These will help you to be prepared for the birth of your little one.
• All The Fun Things Will Need To Stop
You will expect that once your baby is here, you will have to forgo all the fun things like going out, drinking and parties. While you will indeed need to put in an effort to help raise your baby, it does not mean that all the fun times are to end.
Your life will change, but it does not need to be a bad change at all. Talk with your spouse and schedule some free time for yourself. Make sure that you get everything that your spouse needs to be done before you head out.
• Fear Of Being A Bad Dad
The fact that you are scared of becoming a bad dad itself is a sign that you will do everything to stop yourself from being a bad dad. Your child is born with a load of unconditional love for you. All you need to do is take care of your baby. If you are truly terrified, you can take classes in child rearing that will help you out. You will also have to accept that you will make mistakes. But you will also learn a lot.
• Fear Of The Unknown
There are a lot of worries that come with pregnancy and the first is probably the health of both your wife and your baby. You can never know what is store for you. But the best thing you can do is to learn everything about the warning signs of pregnancy. You can also go to the doctor's appointments with your wife and take a birthing class with her.
• The Baby Will Ruin The Marriage
It is unfair to blame the baby for a failed marriage. If it does fail, chances are that the marriage was already on the rocks before you decided on having a baby to save it. Instead of looking at your baby as a marriage saving or destroying device, you should take care and love him/her as much as you can with your wife. This will only bring you together and deepen your bond with each other.
• The Expenses
We can't lie; a baby does cost a lot to the parents. It is especially hard when these expenses are unexpected and sudden, like medical expenses. The regular expenses can be hard to deal too like education. You can make and stick to a budget along with your wife for added financial security. You can also take out a life insurance to help your family, in case something unfortunate happens to you.
• What If The Baby Hates You
This is one to be counted among the irrational fears. It is not possible that your baby won't love you if you give him/her love in return. It is true that you may not bond with the baby immediately, but you will if you hold him/her, help mommy feed and read to the baby regularly. If the baby prefers the mother over you in his/her first few months, do not take it personally. That is just how a baby is conditioned.
• There Will Be No Sex Once The Baby Is Here
Sure, you will not be able to have sex when and where you want once the baby comes. But that shouldn't mean that sex is out of the question. You must work out a schedule with your wife and enjoy your time alone. You can be spontaneous to when your baby doses off unexpectedly. Also, plan to have the grandparent over sometime. This will give you some alone time with your wife and the grandparents will have the little one all to themselves.