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Each and every person in this world is different from one another - starting from looks, voice, characteristics to behaviour, interests, and many other things. It is tough to find two people go hand-in-hand by keeping their priorities intact.
It is impossible without making a compromise or sacrifice. This is the situation between parents and children who stay together for almost two decades. The scenario only gets worse with the passage of time.
If this is the case for people who know each other pretty well, then can you imagine the situation when you are about to meet new people whom you have never known! A small spark is enough to pick up a fight. This is literally the case when a new couple starts living together.
Do problems occur only with the partner? Of course, not. People who are more active in creating trouble in paradise are the relatives and the so-called "mother-in-laws", who are the ones who might lead this. This happens due to lack of understanding. This can be overcome however with a few tricks to bring your mother-in-law over to your side.
This is mandatory in any relationship. Mere respect, even in the absence of affection, can make a bitter relationship feel and look much better. Your mother-in-law has a personality of her own.
You might hardly find anything in common between you and her; however, her values, decisions, etc., must be given respect. Beyond all this, trust her.
Get To Know Her
Take the initiative to start a friendly chat with her. By doing this, you get a golden chance to know your mother-in-law better.
Get her to open up about her childhood, college days, and may be even the way she went along with her partner's mother. Who knows, you might get some useful tips on what she expects out of you.
Sometimes, it might seem like your mother-in-law is taking over the house with her authority over everything. It might even go to the extent of making others in the house corner you. At such times, do not burst out and criticize, instead be polite and let her know that you have your own way of doing things.
Take Her Advice
It is fine to seek help from her. It can be regarding anything in your life - as simple as a recipe or as complicated as your troubled relationship with your partner. However, for sensitive things that relate her child, things must be conveyed in a very practical manner and not by projecting her beloved as the culprit, which might turn things worse.
Make Her Feel Special
Your mother-in-law will love it when she gets some special attention. Most people never celebrate birthdays and anniversaries when they get old enough.
Make these days of her life memorable by throwing a party and of course, gifts, which go without saying. Let her do what she likes and take care of her, after all, she is your partner's mother.
Share Your Interests
If you have any hobby in common with your mother-in-law, then that's great. You already have something to bond over. Even if you don't have anything in common, feel free to ask her to join you in what you do. Or may be even better, be proactive and help revive her lost interests in things that she loves the most.
Hang Out Together
How about taking your MIL along for shopping? If both of you are movie freaks, why not go for one together? The bonding only gets better by opting to be together just to unwind. You can also take it one step ahead by going on a vacation, leaving behind the household chores for a day or two.
Do Not Compete With Her
You are what you are and she is what she is. Your roles cannot be interchanged. She must be better at cleaning the kitchen and just let her be that way. Never try to outdo her and make her efforts go in vain. If she is the one who is good at putting your children to sleep, let her do it. Don't feel egoistic about it. In fact, it is a blessing for you in one sense.
Try Calling Her ‘Mom'
This is not easy to do as it sounds because you already have a mom and no one else might match up to her. Your mom is not going to be replaced just by treating your mother-in-law like one. Try doing it and you will definitely get the shock of your life with all the love and affection that will come your way from her.
Stay In Touch
If you are not living with your MIL, then this must definitely be done. Keep her updated about her child and grandkids by sending pictures. Pay a visit whenever possible just to check on her or else choose to meet in a neutral territory. Simply make a call and inquire about her well-being. She would really appreciate your effort.