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The fact is that it is very easy to love a person when they are at their happiest. The same does not hold good when the other person is going though the lows of life. Now, what is to be noted here is the fact that the lows can be of various forms.
It may be physical, emotional or even societal. While it is easier to deal with your partner who is not physically as attractive as she or he was earlier, it is not that easy to say the same for a person who is emotionally low.
This is because when a person is emotionally low, he or she becomes a completely different person (so much so that it makes you question whether they were the same people you fell in love with).
This type of drastic change is not easy to deal with for anyone on this planet. To make matters worse, when it comes to having an emotional low, it is not possible for anyone to predict how long this will last.
The looming air of uncertainty only makes matters worse for the couple. However, it is important to note here that the true test of love is tested only during such times. Hence, it is all the way more important to support your partner through the lows of life. Here is a set of tips that will help you get there.
1. Do Not Take Their Tantrums Personally
There might be times when your partner may just snap at you for absolutely no fault on your part. Do not take these things personally. Understand that she or he is not shouting at you and it is just their low emotional state that is doing the talking. At times like this, the best thing that you can do is to remain quiet and take it all. Later in the day (or maybe the next day), you can talk it out with them.
2. The Proper Way To Talk It Out
A person who is emotionally low is all the way more conscious about what is being spoken to him or her. Hence, it is important that you make your choice of words very carefully. Something that they would not normally care about might pinch them at the wrong place at such a delicate moment and this might in turn pave the way for a sadder them. Remember, since they are at their emotional low, you are left with no option but to be the more mature one in the relationship.
3. Let Them Have Their Bad Days
Remember what you see is not what it actually is. To you it is just a scene wherein you see the lazing around on the couch all day long. To them, it is the inability to pull them out of bed, despite putting in the best of efforts. Know that there is a world of difference between the two and that you need to give them their space. Thus, if you find your partner breaking into sobs all of a sudden, do not panic. Instead, give them the time to come around and till then, mind your own business.
4. Know When They Need To Talk
Many a times, your partner may feel like wanting to talk to you but they will not approach you simply because they feel that they are becoming a burden to you. It is your duty to ensure that they do not feel that way. Remember, more often than not, all that a person who is emotionally low needs to be heard. By being there when your partner (who is at his or her lowest) needs you, it shows that you are doing the best thing any partner can ever do.
5. Identify What Triggers Them
Any person who is emotionally low has some triggers, which make them get into their sad phase. The thing here is, more often than not, the person is unable to identify the trigger all by himself or herself. Sometimes, when a person does identify a trigger, they like to keep it to themselves simply because they do not want to be judged. By identifying their triggers and doing your level best to keep them away from it, you will be able to improve their emotional state of mind by leaps and bounds.
6. Ask Them What They Need
To a 'normal' person, the needs of a partner suffering from depression may be absurd. Nevertheless, make it a point to get to know it and, if it is possible, try to give him or her the needed help. Sometimes, all they seek may be a simple bar of chocolate or pizza. You will be amazed to see the change in simple things this can get to both your lives.
7. Lower Your Expectations From Them
To be able to do so, the first and foremost thing that must be borne in mind is the fact that your partner is not using his or her state of mind to dodge responsibilities. It has been seen that by lowering the burden of responsibilities on a person, they often snap out of the emotional stress that they are in. This is all the way truer in the case of married couples. Thus, if you find your partner being in an emotionally low state, try to see if it is possible that you can take up some of his or her duties and responsibilities. You will be amazed to notice the massive change that this small act can bring.
8. Understand The Difference Between Grieving And Being Emotionally Low
As is evident from the word itself, 'grieving' is something that occurs after the loss of an individual. This may range from the death of a close family member to that of his or her pet. If you find your partner grieving, it is all the way more important for you to stand by him or her and talk it out. Grieving is something that deserves to be heard.