How To Overcome Fear And Approach Him

Are you wondering how to approach him? Here are some simple steps to do that....

Monday, January 16, 2017, 17:22 [IST]

So, you have a crush in your office. But you don't know how to approach him. You would want to approach him but you feel shy. You wonder how he'd react.

Your fears and doubts make situations worse. Well, there is nothing wrong in a woman taking initiative and speaking to a guy.

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Also, you don't need to directly ask him out on the first day itself. You have lots of time. Test the waters for a few days and observe his behaviour and attitude. Take enough time to gather courage. Here are a few steps to help you out.

Step #1

Firstly, remember this. If your fears or anxiety make you nervous, you don't have to directly ask him out. First, just try to be around him for a few days. If he is a co-worker, stand next to him casually when he is having a casual chat with other colleagues in your office. You don't have to talk anything. You are just one of those people who are silently listening to the conversation. So, you don't need to feel nervous to do that much, right?

Step #2

Repeat step 1 for a few days. Just listen to the conversation when your man is talking to others. When he looks at you, give a casual smile. If you can't do that, just be a silent spectator.

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Step #3

After a few days, observe your feelings. Do you feel comfortable in his presence? By now, you must have listened to his words while he was speaking to others. Try to assess his personalty. Is he a cool guy? Is he friendly? Does he show any interest in your presence? If the answer is no, quit it. But if he seems to be okay, slowly join the conversation. When he is speaking to others, you too add a word or two to the conversation and see how he reacts.

Step #4

If your guy shows any interest, prolong the conversation a bit. If you can't do that right now, do it on some other day.

Step #5

After a few more days, if he shows interest in your words, casually start asking questions about him. It makes him know that you are interested to know about him. Don't ask intrusive ones. Ask simple questions like 'where do you stay?', 'What's you favourite movie?'

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Step #6

When a guy gives a short answer, it is tough to take things ahead. But he tries to prolong the conversation, then it means he is interested in talking to you. Just go with the flow of the conversation and see where it goes. He may even ask you out for coffee if he likes what you guys talk. Show excitement.

Step #7

If you manage to meet him outside the workplace, you can talk about a lot more and see if things workout between you. But in any stage, if you think that he isn't worth your attention, you can always cut the conversation politely and move back. But during every step, ask your instincts. How do you feel in his presence. How is his company? How are his words? What's your overall feeling. Sometimes, your instincts guide you well.

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