Is Dating Your Friend's Ex Out Of Bounds?

Monday, August 8, 2011, 18:18

Dating our friend's ex is a decision we are all shaky to take. It brings forth that totally cliched question of choosing 'love friendship over love' into the picture. However, as we are well aware, love works in weird ways. Whats to stop you from dating your best friend's ex girlfriend or worse falling in love with her. In a world were we all have experiences of break up and it is accepted that all relationships are not forever, ex dating might not seems like a big deal in theory. But in practice is as complicated as marrying your mother's cousin!

Why Is Dating Your Friend's Ex A Bad Idea?

If you date your best friend's ex girlfriend you will be invariably breaking the 'bro code'. The bro code says that your guy friend's girl is not too be pursued as a prospect. Now she may not be your friend's girl any more but it sure does make the relationship complicated.

Your friend might feel that you have been eying his girlfriend for a long time; even before they broke up. So now you are grabbing your chance as soon as you have it. This could be potentially disastrous for your friendship.

If your friend has had a painful and emotionally tumultuous break up then he will expect you to take his side no matter who is right. In this scenario if you start dating your friend's ex it will be interpreted as breach of trust.

Ex dating can disrupt your lifestyle by making 'hanging out' with friends stressful. If you are dating your best friend's ex girlfriend then you cannot take her to a party where they will be face to face making things awkward for both. So invariably you have to constantly choose between your friend and girlfriend causing trauma to both.

If your friend and his girl parted with a bad taste in their mouth then your life is going to be very difficult. Your friend will try to warn you off about all the frailties of his ex. On the other hand, will be your girlfriend sharing her bad experiences with your friend and poisoning you about him. Now dating your friend's ex will be nothing better than a tug of war!

Ex dating can be a total disaster if your friend has ditched his girlfriend. If you give your friend's ex girlfriend a shoulder to cry on then it can lead to a romantic relationship at any point of time. You may feel genuine sympathy for her but that won't be enough after some time. She will expect you to choose sides and forsake your friend for what he did to her.

So all in all, no dating tips or advice can really help you if you are dating your friend's ex. Don't get into this mess!