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Did your ex come out of nowhere and send you a mushy message? Is he/she trying to re-establish things and is not willing to give an explanation or isn't unapologetic about what he/she has done before? Then you must know it might be submarining. The word sounds something like submarines, isn't it?
We all know about submarines, right? The watercraft that is actually quite helpful in carrying out underwater operations. But, the same term is also used in a relationship and trust us on this, this trend is not cool at all!
A person is said to be 'submarining' when your partner dumps you without giving any explanation and a comes back in your life all of a sudden. The person might act as if nothing has changed or happened and that the relationship between two is completely normal.
What Is 'Submarining' In A Relationship?
You might think everything is going wonderful between you and your partner ever since you right swiped him/her. Both of you went a few dates and watched movies together. But all of a sudden your partner stops responding to your messages and calls as if he/she is submarine that went undersea and therefore, there is no contact with the surface.
After a while, you realise you have been ghosted. But this doesn't end here. Eventually, you succeed in moving on and coming out of the gloominess of your relationship and forget the one who ghosted you, but all of a sudden you will see your partner will come back in your life out of nowhere and without any explanation. This is similar to a submarine that surfaces after months.
He/she then acts as if nothing has happened and everything is fine. Also, he/she will start showing interest in you and will look forward to dating you once again but there will be no signs of apology.
Rohit Raj (25), a web designer from Delhi shares his experience to Boldsky and said, "My ex-girlfriend dumped me for another guy. It took me a while to move on from the ghosting incident. But then all of sudden after 4 months she messaged me. She seemed to be interested in dating me once again but she never apologised for her behaviour. Neither she gave an explanation of why she did it ".
"She also invited me to her place and asked whether we can spend some quality time together. However, I declined it as I felt that she might do the same thing again," he added.
Even the twitterati gave their opinions through tweets.
Submarining is the latest creepy dating trend to watch out for https://t.co/ZZj3xO7iEH— The Independent (@Independent) 4 October 2017
SUBMARINING: A new dating term where you ghost and then resurface after an uncomfortable amount of time. Are you guilty? pic.twitter.com/nGXaWRslgY— VIRGIN Radio Calgary (@VirginRadioYYC) 29 September 2017
Submariners might not feel ashamed of their behaviour but you need to be careful if people like these exist in your life. Rohit Raj says, "There were times when I really wanted to reciprocate my feelings after she came back but my instinct stopped me from doing so. I asked her for an explanation but she didn't care to give me a single reason behind her ghosting. She used to change the topic and would ask me to have a fresh start."
Though you might be deeply in love with a submariner, you must accept the fact that he/she ghosted on you and disappeared all of sudden and might repeat the same thing again.
If the person genuinely wants to be with you once again, he/she would usually apologise, accept their mistake, and would give you an explanation regarding the same.
Instead of getting back to such people, it is better to stay on the shore and save yourself from another heartbreak.