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Drawing Healthy Boundaries In Relationships? 10 Things We Can Vouch For

No, relationships are not free of encumbrance and there is no instant trust in a relationship. When it comes to love, we don't like to set boundaries, we want it to be straight out of a fairytale, where everything is perfect and there are happy endings. But, reality begs to differ.

If you are in a long-term relationship, then it is essential that you draw certain boundaries so that your relationship remains healthy.

Also read: 9 Things To Keep In Mind When You Are Dating In Your 30s

Setting healthy relationship boundaries doesn't mean you have to distance yourself from your partner. You may be going through the honeymoon phase in your relationship and making fascinating future plans. But do you know the boundaries in your relationship are no less than a roadmap?

Read on to find out things that you can implement in your relationship to make it healthy.

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Setting Boundaries In A Relationship?

A relationship boundary is more like a personal space where you and your partner grow individually and work on yourself. It helps you in finding out what's more important for you in your relationship and if you are in the right relationship. Boundaries help you in being who you are and making yourself feel confident by working on your self-esteem.

Since you are sharing your life and things related to you with someone, setting up boundaries would help you in listening to what your heart and mind has to say. You would be able to figure out and analyse if you are happy or not and if your partner treats you nicely.

As we know that all relationships are special and different, no two couples are the same and therefore, every relationship could have different relationship boundaries. In order to know what kind of relationship boundaries exist, read more.

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1. What You Share With Each Other

Are you not comfortable in sharing your pillow, tooth brush and perfume with your partner? Then talk about the problems too. It could be possible that your partner wants you to save money in a joint bank account but you are having no such intentions. Therefore, it is better that you set up a boundary when it comes to finances and sharing other things.

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2. What You Post On Social Media

Some couples love the idea of showering love on each other on social media platforms. For example, your partner may tag you in 30+ posts in Facebook and would put those romantic Instagram stories for you. He or she may love sharing those cosy and adorable pictures that boast of your love. In case, you are not so fond of spilling beans about your relationship, then confront your partner and tell him/her that you are uncomfortable.

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3. Are You Comfortable With PDA?

For those who don't know what PDA is, well it means Public display of affection. After you have decided what should or shouldn't go on social media, you could move on to set the boundary for PDA. You could let your partner know if you are not uncomfortable in being cosy with them in public places. Maybe your partner loves to put his or her arms around you while walking on the street, whereas you prefer holding hands. Also, your partner loves to pull your cheeks and plant soft kisses, while you feel uncomfortable with the same. Therefore, it is a must that you draw a boundary here.

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4. What Names You Give To Each Other

No doubt couples love to give sweet and cute names to each other. But it is also about one's personal choices. Maybe you love calling your partner 'honey', 'sweetheart', etc. Or maybe you say, 'I am gonna chop your head for this' when your partner annoys or teases you. But then you need to figure out if he or she is okay with it or not. Therefore, it is better that you talk to your partner and find out what kind of names and statements are acceptable in your relationship.

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5. How Often You Have Sex?

When it comes to physical intimacy, you need to set a boundary there as well. You may like to have sex often, but your partner may not. So, you cannot impose this on your partner that if he/she is in a relationship with you, he/she has to physically active. You and your partner both needs to find common ground here, as in what comforts you and what doesn't.

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6. The Way You Deal With Your Ex(es)

There is no denying that dealing with ex (es) is one of the toughest things to do. You may feel awkward and uncomfortable the moment you find yourself near your ex. Also, you may not be fond of the fact that your partner's ex calls or tries to meet him/her. You may feel bad when your partner talks with his/her ex (es). So, draw boundaries and keep misunderstandings at bay.

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7. How Would You Respect Each Other's Personal Space?

All of us need our personal space and 'me-time'. Not only this, there could be times when you want to hang out with your old pals, go on a solo-trip or pay a visit to your family members.

But nobody could read your mind and find out if you need your personal space. You need to convey the same to your partner. Not setting up boundaries for your personal space and the time that you would be giving to your friends and family could result in severe conflicts in your relationship.

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8. What Measures Will You Take To Resolve Conflicts

Conflicts and disagreement in a relationship are inevitable. But that doesn't mean you would accuse your partner at the top of your voice or start fighting like cats and dogs in the public. Having such an approach while solving your conflicts could harm your relationship in the worst ways. Try to set some boundaries where you decide how you would be resolving the differences and conflicts.

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9. Your Definition Of Commitment

It could be possible that you are ready and eager to commit to your partner but your partner is not thinking the same. That doesn't make your partner wrong. All of us have different choices and preferences. You may assume that your partner is committed to only you, while he or she is seeing other potential partners.

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For you, cheating could be mere flirting and meeting new people, while for your partner these could be indulging in physical relationships with other people. Therefore, not letting your partner know your definition of commitment could bring a huge storm in your love life.

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10. In What Ways You would Handle Your Finances?

It is said that money could ruin even the strongest relationship. So why do you want to take a chance? You may love to buy clothes, shoes and many other kinds of stuff while your partner may not like spending on materialistic things. It could be possible that either of you is not habituated of keeping a track of the expenses and savings while the other one couldn't withstand the same. In such a case, setting up a financial boundary to decide how you would be handling finance could be a great relief.

Telltale Signs That Financial Problems Can Lead To Severe Issues In Your Relationship

When you have no boundaries in your life, a third person may come and mess up your relationship. Drawing boundaries could save you from unnecessary drama and conflicts. You would be able to understand how you want to deal with the problems.

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