How To Tackle Children's Failures?

By Super

Tuesday, May 22, 2012, 12:44

Your child returns home with coloured mark sheets that is more ranked with failure marks than the passed ones. Angry father lifts his belt and the mother makes him starve for the day. The outcome of the punishment is fear of failure and not courage to overcome it.

Spare the rod to mold the child. Most parents do not believe in this slogan. However, take my words that a child will relate to his/ her parents well when, showers of love are poured in than wrath. Have a heartfelt conversation with your child. Tell him/her how you feel due to their failure. Do not pity your child but pity yourself in front of him/her. Talk about your financial strains too, if you are facing any at the moment. Share your dreams about them. Let them know that you care and you are there to help them lift the victory trophy. While having the conversation make sure, there is nobody at home, especially his/her successful sibling.

Help them know their weakness and strengths. After drawing a perfect line between the two, help them build their weakness, if not focus more on their strength. As sometimes, their strengths can overcome every weaknesses on the way. For instances Swarag's ( one of the writer's) weakness as a child was the phobic Maths, but his strength was his flowery language. His mother helped him to overcome with the phobia, but did not help him build his career on it. Instead she persuaded him to learn literature and earn a living from it.

To end with below is the litany of failures, followed by victories that punctuated the life of Abraham Lincoln throughout 30 years. This is an eloquent example of successful use of defeat in achieving victory. Read it aloud to your child to build in hope and desire of success.

Lost job, 1832

Defeated for legislature, 1832

Failed in business, 1833

Elected to legislature, 1834

Sweetheart (Ann Rutledge) died, 1835

Had nervous breakdown, 1836

Defeated for Speaker, 1838

Defeated for nomination for Congress, 1843

Elected to Congress, 1846

Lost renomination, 1848

Rejected for Land Officer, 1849

Defeated for Senate, 1854