Is Your Husband Jealous Of Your Baby?

Marriage And Beyond

oi-Anwesha

By Anwesha Barari

Tuesday, November 15, 2011, 18:15

Does this whole scenario seem totally ridiculous and unreal to you, then you are either lucky or not yet a mother. It is a natural instinct of your husband to be jealous of the new baby that has come into your home and become everybody's centre of attraction. Many couples have this problem after having a baby. The man usually feels that he is being neglected, he feels all his love has gone to the baby and he is now uncared for. New fathers take a lot of time to adapt to the situation so you cannot throw up your hands in exasperation.

Here are some of the reasons that will help you understand your husband's jealousy for the baby and take a more sympathetic outlook to his situation.

Why Your Husband Is Jealous Of The Baby?

• Motherhood begins with conception but fatherhood begins only after birth. You could argue otherwise technically but listen up first.
• You have felt the baby in your abdomen for nine months and the physical bond has already been formed. But for him it was only an elusive sperm that did the job. He does not yet feel physically connected to the baby.
• Earlier he was the apex of your life; your daily activities were planned around him. You pampered him, cooked and dressed for him but now everything is for the baby. He feels that the baby has totally claimed you.
• Couples have problems when the new mom is all paranoid about the baby's safety and hygiene. In your anxiousness to have everything for the baby perfect you have told him off a few time unconsciously.

Tips To Deal With Husband Jealous Of Baby:

• First of all, talk to him to get back that connection that he believes is lost. Share your anxieties with him so that he understands that the baby belongs to both of you.
• New fathers have a problem because nobody gives them the chance to connect with the baby. All the aunts and grandmothers of the little one take over from dad. Put your foot down; it is his baby and he will have the first right to spend time with the baby.
• Give your jealous husband some time alone with the baby. Do not always leave a page full of instructions. Let him make mistakes and learn from them. He is the biological father, his paternal instincts will kick just as soon as you give him the opportunity.Couples have problems of spending quality time together after a baby. You may be the hyper mom unwilling to leave your baby alone for a second but he still wants to go for dinners, late night movies and other outing.
• Although the frequency of these outings will come down do not banish them altogether from your life because marriage problems arise out of stifled wishes.

Follow some of these relationship tips to help your husband to get over the jealousy he feels for the baby.