Jealousy - The Green Eyed Monster

Add as a preferred source on Google

Stella fumed when she saw her fiance whom she dated for 6 years seated beside a beautiful lady. She tried to woo her own spouse in her sweet voice and gestures but alas! she failed. She stood for a while and then banged the chair on the door and walked out of the party. Did you see the green-eyed monster peeping high above Stella? As much as any one would deny it, all couples have feelings of jealousy in a marital relationship. Husbands or wives often struggle with strong feelings of jealousy when they see their partner talking or interacting more with another sex. According to a North American survey of marriage counselors, 33% of all couples in marriage counseling have jealousy problems as a root issue.

Jealousy in marriage need not only be enclosed around with another sex. A spouse can feel jealous if more attention is being paid to the children or friend or an elderly person. For instance when a new child is born in the household, the mother has to spend more time with the baby. At the moment the father may feel unwanted or unnoticed and thus raises jealousy in his heart.

Jealousy is not a bad expression. It is rather necessary during certain situations, as when your spouse is cheating on you. However when you leave this emotion to consume yourself, it destroys your life as it feeds on your insecurity, gutless your self-confidence, and bolts up the trust in your relationship. A jealous spouse will always be in a move to bind his partner with restrictions, like he/she would resent any contact they have with members of the opposite sex. The jealous spouse would always want a reassuring promise that states 'I am still loved'. So what's the solution for this vicious behavior? Here are few steps that can help you to cope with jealousy.

Take control- Do not let jealousy take control of you instead you control it. Do not get jealous or feel suspicious when your spouse looks at a stranger on the road. Trust your partner. Ask yourself 'Do my feelings have a basis in fact?' Is that you do not trust your spouse? Let the answer be in just yes or no. If the answer is no then you are wasting your time on something unimportant. Flush the green-eyed monster off from your life. Remember jealousy can make you feel that the divorce is the sweetest word you have ever heard in a short span of your life.

Honest communication- Be frank, with your partner. When you realize that your partner is paying less attention to you in comparison to his hobbies or friends or any thing else, then tell hi/her that you are feeling lonely and you are jealous about the whole thing. Do not forget to mention that you are jealous because you love him/her and you are die-hard attention seeker. You are spouse will surely embrace you back in love, when he/she learns that you are hurt because of his/her act.

Ask professional help- sometimes when personal problems worsen the relationship it needs professional help. People who experience pathological jealousy and people for whom jealousy triggers violence will benefit well from this method.

These methods may work well for the emotional jealousy of possessiveness or distrust, but if your partner is jealous of your career goal or achievements, then think about your marriage again. Marriage is a unique bond that ensures to enhance each other's growth. If that lacks in your marriage then step back for the marriage has no meaning.