How To Control Your Emotions In A Relationship: Why Emotional Intelligence Is The Key

A partnership is termed as healthy when both the partners are calm and composed, know how to contain their emotions, and successfully keep feelings and impulses under check. Past issues between you two may ruffle your calm time and again but learning to be in control of your feelings and thoughts, helps to transform your relationship into an ideal one.

Also, keeping in control will eventually change the way you look at yourself. Ignoring them as they arise is not the solution that works. Recognize them as they come and face them head-on so that you will be in grip of your emotions. Not giving in to impulses and self-control is the key to a healthy happy relationship.

Emotional intelligence is the key when it comes to maintaining healthy relationships. An overload of emotions can block one's ability to deal with numerous situations and can cause stress, resentment and frustrations. Hiding emotions can be equally damaging, so the key is to process them instead of holding them and exploding one day. Therefore regulating your emotions is the only way to go forward. Here's what you need to do.

1. Thought Behind Your Action Is Important

Extreme feelings can force you to act impulsively. Stop, and analyse the pros and cons of the situation before you decide to blow the fuse. Think of the outcome, and its effects on your relationship, and see if this is the right thing to do in this situation. Rage, jealousy, and even frustration are difficult but not impossible to control.

2. Learn To Analyse Your Emotions

Try to understand what triggered the situation, why you felt so strongly about it and what is it that you want to do about it. Revisit the event mentally and ask yourself why you behave the way you behave. Be honest with your answers.

3. Do Not See Things In A Negative Light

Learn to be less emotional and not trapped in negativities as these feelings do not let us achieve our dream of an ideal relationship Do not ruminate over what happened for days and nights. Focus on being peaceful and not fret over what is already a part of the past.

4. Watch Your Words And Mind Your Language

Do not encourage your partner to talk when you are feeling particularly weighed down by negative emotions. You will likely burst and shout at him. Things are best solved when you are calm. Be mindful of your tone and communication while conversing.

5. Figure Out A Right Way To Communicate Properly

If you have to tell your partner what you expect from him, you have to first of all check your impulse and emotions that come in the way. The major impediment to communication is the pent up rage and anger etc. Shouting will only precipitate the problem and not end the problem.

6. Try Pranayama To Calm Your Moods

This is certainly a sure-fire remedy which relives you of stress, brings down your heart rate and blood pressure. You will gain clarity over issues which is what is wanted.

7. Walk Away To Avoid Clashing

Words spoken once can not be taken back as they leave a lasting impact on us. In the midst of a heated argument, if you feel something is stopping you from speaking a word,, just walk away from the scene until you are calmer to handle the situation.

8. Accept What Is Right And Do Not Lose Sight Of Truth

It is good to vent out your frustrations as it is a healthy way of keeping emotional disturbances at bay. But you are not allowed to lose your grip over what is right and what is wrong and behave in an unfair manner. Give a patient hearing, accept facts as and when they are stated and be rational in your reactions.

9. The Kind Of Relationship You Look Forward ToIf you

think your love is strong and longer lasting than your bad moods and resentment, just ask yourself " Is this about what I actually asked for?" If you feel your love towers over the minor disagreements, you can disregard the minor mood changes and work on resolving your mood flare-ups.

10. Talk To A Trusted Friend

Sometimes seeing things from a third person's viewpoint, would help you to see things from their right perspective. If things are going out of hand, consult a friend who is familiar with your moods and understands you. Take help if you need it, of family and friends as they will always stand by you in times of struggle and uncertainty.

11. Forgive And Move On

Inability to handle the past hurt will make it harder to control your present emotions. Forgive and move on as you do not deserve this self-inflicted punishment. Clinging to hurt and pain will never let you move on.

12. Seek Help If It's Too Unbearable

In case your experiences have been traumatic and you have been a victim of your partner's infidelity, it would be really hard to contain your emotions. If these emotions have a say on your peace of mind, you need professional help to sort things out. It is not a sign of mental instability to approach an expert for help as it is ultimately you and your marriage that you are trying to save.