Being A New Father – Anxious Or Accommodating?

By Nandhini Devi

Thursday, June 9, 2011, 12:26

Welcoming a new member to any family is a very exciting prospect. Specially, to the parents. It is almost every married couple's dream to have a child. But when we speak about childbirth or pregnancy, we speak of it only in terms of the mother. However, if more new fathers got involved in the process of fatherhood, it would help in building happier families.

In most of the cultures, pregnancy is regarded as a 'woman affair', specially in India. This makes us exclude the new father from any participation in the process of pregnancy and post-pregnancy. We have to understand that a new dad too feels anxious during this phase. Allowing a man to participate and interact with his wife right from the onset of pregnancy, helps in creating closer family bonds. Let us look at a few tips that would help in the new dad in this transition..

Tips for new fathers:

1.Pregnancy is not about motherhood or fatherhood, it is about parenthood. Studies have shown that a woman's psychology makes her feel concerned about the father's capability to protect the child. So, if the new father tries to understand the difficulties a mother faces, for example, morning sickness, back pain etc., it would put her at ease. To-be-new-fathers can enroll into prenatal classes to relate better with the mother's problems.

2.It is better if the men can accompany their wives during the visit to the doctor. They can put forward their questions. Listening to the child's heartbeat or watching the baby's images during sonography helps the father bond better with the child.

3.Communicating with your wife plays an important role in this phase. She will be prone to mood swings. However, maintaining a calm composure is very important in helping the mother understand that you are there for her. Feeling the baby's movements and talking to the unborn baby is a great experience, which does not happened every other day.

4.Men too are programmed to be fathers. Right after the wife gets pregnant the husband too experiences hormonal changes. These changes help him in adjusting to the various changes that occur after the baby is born.

5.New fathers have to involve with the mother during the process of breast-feeding. Holding the baby when he is suckling, or speaking gently to the mother when she is feeding, or stroking the baby, helps the mother to enjoy the process of breast-feeding. If the mother is happy, the baby too is happy.
6.After the baby arrives at the house, you have to alter your daily routine and include activities that allow you to interact more with the child. This may include bathing, massaging, feeding etc. Following this tip allows you to understand the child better.

7.Post-partum depression is something that most women undergo after childbirth. Check for signs and seek medical advise, if necessary. Constant interaction with your wife and helping her with the chores will make sure that she is contented and happy.

8.A mother needs to take rest. But a baby needs constant handling too. So help her take her time off. Pitch in whenever possible and take care of the baby.

9.Check the house for any possible damages that would lead to any mishaps. Do not to keep any sharp or dangerous items in the open. Keep the house insect free. Remember, prevention is better than cure.

10.Saving money for your child is something that is mandatory for every parent. Find out about policies that give back maximum returns and subscribe with them. Talk to your wife and seek her suggestions that would help you save for the child.

The above mentioned points are to be taken only as parenting tips. This unique parent-child relationship is all about devoting your time and expressing your love for each other in more than many ways. You learn more every single day, every day your child grows and you see more in this lovely relationship.