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10 Ways To Cope With An Addict In The Family

Addicts are manipulative, destructive and dramatic. They can lie to you to achieve their own ends, and yet, when they are clean, you remember why you loved them in the first place.

You may empathise with their 'weakness' and feel a compelling need to help. But, helping addicts is not easy. Often, the addict uses your helpfulness against you. They may even blame their addiction on you. You may end up walking on fire trying not to trigger their addictions, particularly if they are violent.

Today, we’re looking at 10 ways to help addicts and their families to cope with addiction. Before you go through these 10 ways to help addicts, evaluate what stage the addict in your life is. Have they acknowledged they have a problem? Are they committed to recovery and seeking professional help? Do they understand that they have no control over their addiction? Do they keep relapsing, thinking they will have a different outcome each time?

HEALTH BENEFITS OF SPICY FOOD

Whether you’re dealing with an addict in denial, recovery or relapse, take a look at these 10 ways to help addicts. You may pick up some pointers on coping or reiterate what you already know. These 10 ways to help addicts and their families cope with the ravages of addiction may make a positive difference in your life.

Recognise that addiction is a disease

Recognise that addiction is a disease

This will help you and the addict gain perspective, without evading responsibility. Labelling addiction as a disease will make it seem more realistic to manage.

Get professional help

Get professional help

Don't attempt to 'cure' the addict through love. Leave the rehabilitation part of helping addicts to medical and mental health professionals. Get regular counselling, together and separately.

Understand

Understand

One of the top 10 ways to help addicts is to read and talk about the nature of addiction. Knowledge demystifies and helps you cope better.

Join support groups

Join support groups

Alcoholics Anonymous (AA) and Narcotics Anonymous (NA), among others, do a tremendous job of helping addicts. Research shows that addicts on support groups perform significantly better and relapse less.

Live your life

Live your life

You have little control over the addict's behaviour, so avoid the co-dependent trap: becoming lethargic, falling apart, losing interest, or paying less attention to your children. Don't let the addiction consume you too.

Surround yourself with friends

Surround yourself with friends

As the addict's spouse, parent or offspring, it's crucial that you have non-judgemental folk to lend you an ear or shoulder. For your part, try not to be too needy.

Don’t rush to the rescue

Don’t rush to the rescue

One of the 10 ways to help addicts is by being not helpful. Addicts assume and expect you to provide them money or keep hauling them to detox. Wait, think and decide before you act to define your boundaries.

Don’t belittle the addict

Don’t belittle the addict

A crucial part of helping addicts who are committed to recovery is giving them respect. Don't treat them as less than human, or impaired.

Watch out for addictive behaviour

Watch out for addictive behaviour

Sometimes, the addict may stop their addiction, but find an outlet in other compulsive behaviour, such as shopping, porn or gambling. You must alert your counsellor at once.

Acknowledge positive behaviour

Acknowledge positive behaviour

If they're trying to stay clean or sober, don't keep bringing up their past misdemeanours. If you're sincere about helping addicts, move forward.

Story first published: Thursday, May 29, 2014, 19:06 [IST]
Read more about: addiction drugs