New Confidence

Swami Chinmayananda

oi-Staff

By Staff

Wednesday, December 17, 2008, 10:17

One of the devotees was rather a meek person when she first spent time with Swamiji ( Swami Chinmayananda). She had gone to the Vivekacudamani Camp at the Sidhabari ashram and made a habit of joining Swamiji at satsang when he used to sit outside his kutiya, with a group of devotees sitting at his feet in a semicircle around him.

The first day he said to her:

"Come, you sit near me".

So she sat down near him and continued to do so during subsequent satangs also, but one day the crowd had grown quite large, and she couldn't find a place near him and sat at the back.

Swamiji called out to her:" Now you're lost in the crowd. I told you sit near me!".

"I'm ok, Swamiji," she said quietly.

Later, Swamiji told her: "You should not bow down to anyone". It had become a habit with her to be submissive, but now, with Gurudev's loving help, she was learning to become more assertive. He continued to pay special attention to her and pamper her until she grew in confidence and assertiveness.

Probably none of us had ever experienced, through other contacts, the measure of understanding and love that Gurudev bestowed upon us. Both small gestures of deep compassion and grandiose demonstrations of his love left us wondering: "Can he really love me this much – me, with all my imperfections?"