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Guidelines To Deal With Negative Peer Pressure

Posted By: Staff

Simren walked out of her house, with a short skirt, weird hairstyle and innumerable beaded strings around her neck, to voice out the latest trend of her peer group 'Cool Babe'. When her mother asked her teenage daughter to dress well, she replied, " All my friends dress this way.... they laugh at my baggy pants and hilarious shirts." Have you gone through this phase as a parent? Then here are some guidelines to help you deal with your child's negative per pressure.

Encourage them to have lots of activities

Whenever your kids brood in a corner of the room, with nothing to do, fill their time with productive activities, that gives them a social outlet. This will also limit unstructured time for getting into trouble.

Don't nag.
Teenage is a period of life, where a person become more vigorous to do things that have been limited to him by the elders and the society. Therefore don't lecture them or nag them every hour on what to do and not to do as too many reprimands may drive them into the crowd you are trying to avoid. Your nagging may incite her to be spiteful and rebellious too.

Make sure to pick your battles as it is safe to fight back the negative peer pressure. For instance, if you fight over every hairstyle and piercing your child expresses to do, then they will not render to any of your advice when it comes to areal big stuff. Kids at this age need to express themselves and rebel, so if your child isn't doing anything harmful in the long run, then let it go. For example, If your child dyes her hair blue but doesn"t take drugs, you are still on the safer side.

The coping strategies
Make your child feel the way she/he dresses as the latest trend in the world of glamor and style. This will help them not to be wannabes. Flatter her with comments like " You are looking so cool - let's shop for some more clothes". You can even bring in the topic of alcohol and cigarettes in the form of humor or just another discussion, for instance, "Beer tastes like dishwater. I'd rather have a Diet Coke." or "My mom would kill me if I smelled of cigarette smoke. Anyway, it's not worth it too."

Know all about their peer group
It's important to know all about your kids peer group to make sure that your child is hanging around a safe friends circle. Make a detailed study of even their parents. If you think your child is going around with the wrong troop then make them understand tactfully, for instance, ' I see that George smokes and even takes drugs every other day... however the fact was not surprising as his father is also into it. Why don't you help your friend get rid of such bad habits..." by following this method your helping your child change his/her peer group than he/she getting influenced by it.

Another tactful method with the same situation would be, " I see that George smokes and even takes drugs every other day... however the fact was not surprising as his father is also into it.... and it seems they are having trouble holding down jobs because of that". This method helps your child understand what the negative influence can effect his/her life. This will help them to part their peer group after few days.

Be your child's 'Best Friend'
This the best way to deal with your child's growing interests on their peers 'wannabe' attitudes. Be your child's best friend, by sharing your own varied experiences as a teenager, where you had to cope with the similar peer pressure. Talk to them about your deepest feelings about love, romance, ambitions and your every step to stardom and glory as you grew old. Inspire them to lead a respectable life in the society. Make sure to even talk about sensitive topics like sex, death, war and many more. Exchange a healthy debate before going to bed to strengthen your relationship with the child.

Read more about: parenting tips, children, relationship
Story first published: Friday, February 1, 2008, 16:29 [IST]
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