How To Learn The Art Of Saying 'NO'?

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oi-Anwesha

By Anwesha Barari

Monday, January 16, 2012, 16:32

All powers divine are encompassed in this monosyllabic word, 'no'. You may feel that you say no all the time but saying no exactly when it is required is what you have to learn to do. Sometimes the biggest decisions in your life are taken by others because you cannot refuse help. You end up in the a career unsuitable for you, married to the person you cannot love and doing work that is not yours because your personality development is not strong enough to say no.

Here are some guidelines to help to learn saying no to people and situations.

Tips To Learn Saying NO:

1. Remember, you are not answerable to everyone just like everyone is not answerable to you. You cannot ask you teammate not to talk incessantly on the phone and in the same way he cannot tell you to cover up from him.

2. Never make excuses for saying no. You come across as lame and pathetic. You have to say firm no with such an air than an explanation is not even necessary. Never think about excuses like 'I can't drop you home because I am visiting my aunt'. Just say 'Can't do it today. Got some thing planned up.'

3. Fine tune your personality development in such a way that you never apologies for refusing help. You need not say, 'sorry I can't finish your files because I have to go to my wife's birthday party'. Just say, 'can't do it, I am busy myself'.

4. You cannot refuse help to your superiors as easily as you do to your peers or sub ordinates. For this purpose you have to improve your communication skills in such a way that you can refuse intelligently and make no enemies out your superiors. You can put it as if you are not the right guy for the job even when you really want to do it. Your senior must never suspect you refused.

5. Saying no to unknown people at work may be easy but things become difficult on the home front. What if you have to say no to someone you love or worse one of the two people you love. This happens to most guys who can neither deny their mother nor their wife certain things.

6. The best way to deal with this dilemma is to understand that you cannot make everybody happy. Do a quick SWAT analysis and see whose claim is more legitimate and then stand by your decision. Never falter under pressure because if you do then you will always be emotionally blackmailed by that person.

Here are some of the ways of improving your communication skills so that you learn saying no at the right places.