How To Share Kitchen With Mother-in-law?

Marriage And Beyond

oi-Anwesha Barari

By Anwesha Barari

Tuesday, July 26, 2011, 18:13

Your relationship with your mother-in-law is an integral part of your married life. You have to deal with mother-in-law on a daily basis for numerous issues. You are also bound to have problems with mother-in-law. When you and your mother-in-law are under the same roof then some conflict is to expected as nutural.

It has been proven by psychologists that women covet control over the kitchen. The kitchen might just be the place that brings conflict in your relationship with your mother-in-law. Deal with mother-in-law in the kitchen and half the battle is won. The one who rules the kitchen, rules the house. If you are having problems with mother-in-law in that originate from the kitchen then you need to understand certain basic things.

• Your mother-in-law has been the woman of the house for decades; she is not going to give it up to a you. In her opinion, you are 'just a girl' so you need to work on changing that.
• Every mother likes to think that her children love her cooking. No matter how horrendous a cook your mother-in-law is, she too thinks the same. If your husband likes your cooking, your mother-in-law is going to keep you out of the kitchen.
• To deal with mother-in-law you have to remember that she is a woman just like you are. So the 'female ego' about being incomplete with ones culinary skills is an issue with too.

If your relationship with mother-in-law has to be salvaged then you need to keep the following points in mind.

• If you are a working woman then your problemis already solved. Why do you want control of the kitchen when you are already slogging at work. Let your mother-in-law cook and enjoy the food!
• Don't try to forcefully oust her from the kitchen. This will damage your relationship with mother-in-law irreversably.
• Don't get irritated if she gives you mean jobs like chopping and peeling to do at first. Hang around in the kitchen and gradually take control in your own hands.
• Take responsibility and that will make her realise that you are capable. Make use of occassions when guests or relatives come over to reduce your mother-in-law's work burden.
• Try to win her over by learning her 'special' dishes. In this way your relationship with mother-in-law will grow stronger and you will gain access to the kitchen.
• Finally, you have to settle down at some compromise. If she is coming halfway then you too extend an olive branch. Share the kitchen amicably. Cook a couple of dishes each and retain your autonomy over your respective dishes.

While dealing with mother-in-law in the kitchen, it is important not to antagonize her. If you have patience, then all your mother-in-law problems can be solved.