Living in together before marriage is a pretty standard practice nowadays. But at least in India, live-in relationships still pose some practical problems. These problems of living in together before marriage can ruin your relationship even before you have got started. So you must tread with caution and move in together after following some basic steps.
For example, it is very important that you get a place that does not have a problem with couples living in together before marriage. Live-in relationships are not illegal in India but a lot of moral policing goes on. Always tell the truth to your owner and your neighbours no matter how unpleasant it may sound.
Living together before marriage is often like a period of adjustment before marriage. So you will be spending time together and trying to build a family life as a couple. However, you are still not married and you don't want to scare your partner by sticking to him or her. You must treat a live-in relationship like any other relationship sometimes by giving enough space.
Here are some basic steps that you must follow if you are living together before marriage.
Getting A Place
Look for an understanding owner and a friendly neighbourhood when you are living in together before marriage. It is very important to avoid hassles later on.
Set It Up Together
The house belongs to both of you, so you must set it up together. Do everything, from painting the walls to arranging the furniture together.
Divide The Stuff
It is very difficult to fit in all the stuff that belongs to you together. A single home does not need 2 television sets or refrigerator. So pick the items you need from each other's stuff and sell the rest. And if you don't have something then buy it together.
Have Personal Space
Even when you move in together, you need some privacy. So have your own personal space within the house. It is very important to have separate work stations where you can work on your laptops or read.
Divide The Costs
Always share the cost of running the household like rent, the payment of the household help etc. One partner should not feel that there is too much financial burden on him/her.
Do The Groceries Together
Since you are a couple living together now, you have to find time to do grocery shopping for the house together. It might be a routine way to bond and you get to know each other's preferences.
Share The Chores
You have decide how to divide the household chores like cooking, cleaning and organising. Here too, the division of labour needs to be equal so that either partner doesn't feel aggrieved.
Try To Have Meals Together
Now that you are living together before marriage, try to adjust your mealtimes with each other. Eating together is an important part of bonding. But make exceptions for dinner with friends or official parties.You still have your own life.
Start Playing Hosts Together
Since you have a place of your own, you can now start throwing house parties together. Playing hosts to common guests is a fun part of living together. Also make sure that you call your respective friends at home for coffee or get-togethers.
Never Leave The House After Fights
When two people live together, they are bound to fight. But the solution to a fight is not to pack your bag and leave. Keep that option only for conflicts that cannot be solved. You can stop talking to each other even when you live under the same roof.