Helpful Dads Hurts The Self-Esteem Of Super-Mums

Marriage And Beyond

oi-Devaki

By Devaki

Friday, March 19, 2010, 16:33

The 'super-moms' who manage both career and traditional child-rearing roles, does not like their husbands helping them at home, says the new surveys. They see it as an attack on their self-esteem.

The survey conducted interviews with more than 80 dual-earner couples, who are the parents of eight-month-old infants. This helped them to measure the two aspects of self-esteem including self-liking and self-competence.

In a society where women are expected to take a main role in parenting, the mothers who are working sometimes may not be able to accept their failures to fulfil the cultural expectations. This becomes a reason for the ego clashes, when their husbands are involved and skilful in their 'territory'.

"Many wives would say care-giving by their husbands is helpful but at the same time wives give their husbands negative feedback because their husbands' care-giving style is different from their own. For example, a wife appreciates when her husband feeds their baby but also tells her husband that after all it makes more work because the way the husband feeds is messy," says a psychological expert.