How To Say No In A Relationship

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A 'No' uttered from the deepest conviction is better than a 'Yes' merely uttered to please, or worse, to avoid trouble. - Mahatma Gandhi

Being in a relationship is a wonderful feeling. You discover things about your special one, things he/she hasn't probably shared with anyone else. Mostly it makes you feel awesome but at times the truth may be too overwhelming.

Maybe this happens only in some countries and we are one of them. Most of us don't believe in the dating game, where you get to know the person first and then decide if you like him/her. The problem here is that it becomes increasingly difficult to say "NO". We assume that if we say "NO", that will be the end of the relationship or something far worse.

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Contrary to a popular belief that couples should always agree with each other for a happy relationship, its actually the other way around. Be brutally honest to each other. Your love will be much more transparent and the bonding will be far stronger. Don't be a wimp and lie your way through everything. But right now, let us learn how to say "no" in a relationship without being mean or hurtful to each other.

Read on to find out.

Predict and evaluate: We humans have a sixth sense, which tells us internally when something is about to happen. A guy knows if a girl is ready to take things to the next level or not. The same way a girl knows if the guy is about to pop the question, even though she mostly acts surprised. Act before things get out of hand. Speak about your feelings, your expectations and finally why you have to say "NO", and say it anyway. The first step in how to say "no" in a relationship is to predict and evaluate your next course of things.

"Its too soon": Mostly girls say this and the guy is at the receiving end. Not to seem partial, but lets accept it, except for some simpleton somewhere, every other guy wants to initiate the plans for the "next step" in love. That's what they say anyway. The reasons can be various, right from peer pressure, to the need to experience stuff in life. But whatever the reason it does not validate forcing any person, be it a guy or a girl to get intimate with you. You may love the person to death but maybe for some reason you just aren't comfortable getting intimate with that person, at least not yet. So another polite way to say "no" in a relationship say is to say, "Its just too soon."

"Maybe in the future": You can do things in your own well-defined time. If you don't want to do something, you can always say "May be next year", or something along the lines. Its not essentially lying per se. You are just trying to know things and maybe you will have an answer by the end of the week, the month or the year. You don't have to strain your brain on how to say "no" in a relationship, as a loving partner would understand and stay with you on the "maybe".

Let him/her know that you're being forced: You don't have to be a silent warrior about the fact that you are being forced for. Most of us don't want to hurt the feelings of our partner. You can let your partner know that you aren't willing for the time being to get married or get intimate or whatever you want to say "No" for. Everyone has differences, we just choose to deal with it in our own way. Some confront it, while others just let it pass and wait for it to get multiplied in size. The wise thing to do is to confront it and let the other person know how you really feel. This is one of the best ways to say no without hurting someone's feelings.

Its all about respect: At the start of every relationship couples respect each other immensely. We don't mean to say that it just ends one fine day, but it diminishes at a staggering pace. Perhaps they take each other for granted. But it is of utmost importance to remember that respect means a lot, even if you are in a relationship since a long time. Say "NO" if you have to but don't lie and disrespect each other. Lying never made anything right, even though temporarily it makes things pretty rosy. Value each other for being truthful, relationships have a longer shelf life that way. Respect each other and together learn how to say no in a relationship.