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Deal With Your Child's In-Laws

By Staff
Deal With Your Child's In-Laws

Seema's father was storming with fury as he returned to the house after a visit to his beloved daughter's family. The insinuating remarks from his daughter's in-laws were ringing in his mind. He wondered about his own patience to endure those comments and vowed for the umpteenth time in the day that he would never set foot in that house again.

Things started to go amiss from the next week after Seema and Reghu's engagement. Seema's in-laws started to complain about the poor quality of wedding preparations in comparison with their own daughter's so called lavish wedding. At the same time they insisted in not taking any dowry and demanded that Seema might wear only moderate amount of jewellery.

Seema's wedding day turned out to be a real chaos for her parents. Reghu's parents started to shoot nasty comments from the very day of wedding as starting from the low quality of jasmine garlands to the inadequacy in the butler's wedding costume. Surprisingly they also mentioned that Seema's parents gave her only moderate amount of jewellery. The marriage turned out to commencing an enmity between two families rather than starting a new relationship.

Days passed by. The families started to wag their vicious tongues at each other through common relatives. The only solace during all these whirlpool was that Seema and Reghu found trust and love in each other. However

it became difficult for both of them to trust and love each other's families. The long ran hatred took a new deviation as Reghu's mother poured abuse on Seema's father and he returned home in a collapsed state.

The above mentioned situation is a common scene in India, where marriage means the union of two families. As the time progresses, each family may demand the couple to accept their own ways while pointing out the mistakes of their child's in-laws. The worst sufferers in this situation is none other than the child and his/her partner. In that case it is always better to have a healthy deal with your child's in-laws than turning your child's life into a hell.

The lesson from wise monkeys:
This is the first step to sign a healthy deal with your child's in-laws. At the initial stage, you do not have to lend your ears to the critical comments coming through the alternating tongues of your relatives. Be careful not to mention anything ill about your child's in-laws to common relatives as it may deteriorate your own status and will stimulate unwanted disputes. Never interfere in the disputes between your child and his/her in-laws unless or until he/she seeks your assistance.

Forget and Forgive:
Do you feel that your child's in-laws are treating him/her well?If yes, why you have to worry about the nasty comments aimed at you? Since your child first opened his/her eyes, your entire happiness was depended on their smiles. If someone who cares for them aims an evil will; you can easily forgive them for your child's happiness. Trust me, your patience will definitely win you the respect and affection from others.

Take your child into confidence:
You must never turn your child against his/her in-laws. It is always better to avoid any bad feeling about your child's in-laws from them. However if your child feels sorrowful about his/her in-laws' ill treatment towards you, calm them down. Convince your child that you will always be with them and never indulge in any unnecessary disputes. Your child must feel that you are the best parent in the world and they can come back to you whenever necessary.

The relationship between you and your child's in-laws may go to an averse condition even after all these necessary steps. In that pathetic condition avoid all the contacts with the unwanted family. Be with your child and his/her partner without any prejudice and they will recognize your value for sure!

Story first published: Monday, December 15, 2008, 16:00 [IST]