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Who doesn't want to feel loved? It is such a warm feeling to be admired and cared for by someone and we all long for that person in our lives. When you are in a romantic relationship, you can easily depend on that person to fulfil your emotional needs. But over a period of time, we fail to realise that one of the partners can become selfish without even realising it themselves.
At times, your partner can be a narcissist and selfish at the same time and that can cause major problems in your relationship. When you are in a relationship, it is about considering your partner's likes and dislikes as well. Put all your thoughts to rest for. We have listed down some tell-tale signs that can help you to know if you are being selfish in your relationship.
1. You Have To Win An Argument Even If You Are Wrong
Whenever there is an argument between you and your partner, your focus is not on how to solve a problem but how you can win an argument. Even if your words hurt your partner to a great extent, you make sure that you do not lose an argument.
2. You Pay No Heed To Your Partner’s Opinion
Couples often ask for each other's opinions before making any important decision. But if you think that you must not value your partner's opinion, as you are the most important person, then it is a sign that you are being selfish in your relationship. Even if your partner is not so mature, sometimes his or her opinion can be better than yours.
3. You Always Want To Compete Against Your Partner
Feeling competitive can sometimes help you in focusing on your goals but competing against your partner to put him or her down is selfish. You need to understand that everyone is different and what we can do is accept each other. Feeling unhappy after your partner gets a promotion or a nice job and looking forward to bring him or her down is not a good thing. This may bring bitterness to your relationship.
4. You Always Control Your Partner
You need to understand that a healthy relationship involves two individuals who make equal efforts in the relationship. Controlling or dominating your partner can make it suffocating for both of you. If you believe that it is necessary to control your partner then probably nothing can save your relationship from falling apart.
5. You Want Your Partner To Listen To Everything You Say
When in love, partners do change their certain habits or behaviour for the sake of their partner's happiness. But expecting that to make you happy is a sheer of the partners will always do it your partner to change his or her behaviour according to your desire, is an act of selfishness. Remember that your partner is a human and not an object that you will mould him or her in your own way. Instead, help them to become the best version of themselves.
6. You Rarely Offer Olive Branches After Fight
Love is never one-size-fits-all and therefore, there are times when you and your partner may have various differences. That doesn't mean you can't be the first one to initiate reconciliation with your partner. But if you think that it is your partner's duty to seek forgiveness and makes things normal all the time then it is a selfish act.
7. You Tend To Impose Your Decisions On Your Partner
It is good that you think the best for your partner and are always concerned for him or her. But it is totally a selfish act to impose your decisions on your partner without taking his or her choices into account. Rather than imposing your decisions and setting some strict rules for your partner, you can try explaining your perspective to him or her.
8. You Value Only Your Needs And Desires
At times, you may feel that it is okay to fulfil your desires and needs but if you are doing this repeatedly, then it can be an act of selfishness. You need to understand that caring for your partner's needs and wishes as equally important. If you are least concerned about your partner's choices then after a certain point of time he or she too may lose interest in taking care of your needs as well.
9. You Want Your Partner's Attention All The Time
It is obvious for couples to want their partner's attention but doing negative things to gain his or her attention isn't a great thing to do. For example, if your partner is extremely busy in doing something important and you are disturbing him or her to gain the attention shows that you only care about yourself.
10. You Do Not Admit Your Mistakes Easily
It is a good thing to admit your mistakes and apologise in case you did something wrong. But if you do not feel the need to apologise, especially when it is your mistake and make your partner feel guilty, even if it is not there fault, then you need to understand something is wrong with you and not them.
11. You Hate Your Partner's Flaws
All of us have flaws and it is ok to make mistakes. As a partner, you must learn to accept your partner's flaws and help him or her to work on their strengths and become a better person. Not accepting your partner's flaws is not a good thing to do and this may affect your relationship in a negative manner in the long run.
12. You Manipulate Your Partner Quite Often
If you look forward to manipulating your partner for gaining various favours and whatever you want, then this could be a sign of being selfish in your relationship. Instead of manipulating your partner, you can try having effective communication with him or her.
13. You Always Threaten To End The Relationship
There can be times when you may feel that your relationship is no more the same. You may feel eager to fix things which is actually a good thing. But threatening your partner that if things don't go according to your will, you may end the relationship is also a sign of being selfish. Instead of threatening your partner, you can talk about the problem and try solving it in an effective way.
People need to understand that nobody will like to be in a romantic relationship with a partner who is self-centered and is concerned only about himself or herself. A happy and healthy relationship comprises of mutual respect and understanding. Both individuals need to put equal efforts in the relationship to make the best out of it.
We are not cupids but we hope that the above-mentioned signs will help you to understand the issues of your partner and help you to save your relationship from hitting a dead end.