Disloyalty in marriages could be a self-inflicted injury

Published: Friday, November 3, 2006, 14:48 [IST]

A friend from Bangalore recently forwarded me an interesting email saying that it would help me pep up my spirits and think beyond the news world. It was a story of a husband caught by his wife with literally pants down and making it with a pretty woman outside his marriage.

The wife got very furious and blurted: "You are a disrespectful pig!" "How dare you do this to me, a faithful wife, the mother of your children! I'm leaving you. I want a divorce immediately!"

Husband: "Hang on a minute my love. Let me at least tell what happened: "Fine, go ahead", she sobbed, "but they'll be the last words you'll say to me!"

Husband: "I was getting into the car to drive home and this young lady here asked me for a lift. She looked helpless and pitiable that I took pity on her and let her into the car. Looking very dirty, thin and shoddily dressed, she told me that she hadn't eaten for three days! So, out of compassion, I brought her home and gave her the 'special dish' I made for you la

Since she needed a clean-up I suggested a shower. I noticed her clothes were dirty and full of holes so I threw them away. As now needed clothes, I gave her the designer jeans that you have had for a few years, but don't wear because you say they are too tight.

I also gave her the lingerie that was your anniversary present, which you don't wear because I don't have good taste. I found the sexy blouse my sister gave you for Christmas that you don't wear just to annoy her and I also donated those boots you bought at that expensive boutique and don't wear because someone at work has a pair like them."

He took a quick breath and continued: "She was so grateful for my understanding and help and as I walked her to the door she turned to me with tears in her eyes and said '"Please........do you have anything else that your wife doesn't use?'

Ha ha-ha ! Yes, I also giggled the same way as you may have, with a wide smile. But reading between the lines does offer a food for thought about why our invaluable relationships turn sour. The anecdote does reveal the 'million dollar secret' why our marriages go awry?

The mini comic description of a married life coming close to DIVORCE, the most common word on almost every youngster's lips, showcases how we fail to treasure someone's affection with true love.

Ths story may be sublime and hilarious but it can be applicable to our homes, irrespective of man or woman. This may sound like a joke but it's the reality many people realise long after they get separated.

We just keep ignoring the ones who actually love us at home. And, we cry foul if that person shifts loyalty or attention to someone else outside marriage or family life. And, then starts the drama of making hue and cry over 'honesty' in relation.

Isn't the anecdote a reality of our relationships, which is writing off the sanctity of relations? Isn't it something, which can happen to anyone feeling sidelined or almost rubbished as useless?

There are thousands of families where physical traits or fascination towards better attractive individuals have ruined marriages.

Disappointed with the disrespect and daily abuses over petty issues often brings sourness in relations. It is time we organised our lifestyle to accommodate others' feelings and interests.

How beautiful it would appear if at least for one day in a week, we tell our spouse: "I love you for you're understanding and care that you show for making my day."

After all a married world has to be enjoyed by both as friends, not master and the maid!

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