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Rules For Dating A Guy With Kids
Looking at a man you will not be able to tell whether he is single, married, divorced or a widower. There would also not be any clue about his having or not having children. If you fall for a guy and gradually get to know that you are dating a guy with kids it can come as a big blow to you – at least initially. As things sink in and clarifications are made you may or may not want to date that guy. The decision will be entirely yours – especially if you are single.
FACTORS THAT MAKE FOR THE PERFECT KISS
Depending upon your comfort levels and plans for the life ahead you decide the future of your relationship. In most cases single unmarried women are not ready to accept a man with kids as there is an underlying feeling of insecurity. But how far is this feeling true? If you happen to be dating a divorced man you should realize the fact that a relationship that once existed is over and the man is ready to move on in life. If you truly love the guy the presence of his children should not cause you any problems.
In fact, your moving into his life can cause disturbances in the lives of his children which you will have to try to settle. Looking at the bright side, a man with children is more sensitive and compassionate.
If you are dating a guy with kids keep in mind the following
We often hear that true love is blind, unconditional and sees no boundaries. Is it really so? Not really. For any relationship to succeed both parties should be compassionate about each other and respect one another. In the absence of respect things can go topsy-turvy and what would follow would be a stream of unpleasant and unwanted situations. If you are dating a guy with kids you need to be all the more careful.
Kids get priority: Whether you like it or not the first preference in his life will always be his children. On the contrary you should be pleased about the fact that your man is so caring and loving for his children because that speaks miles about his commitment towards his responsibilities. It shows how loving and caring a person he is and when the need be he will be there for you too.
Accept the presence of the ex: If you are dating a divorced man with kids the presence of the ex-wife cannot be ignored. You will have to accept her involvement in your man’s life when it concerns the life ‘their’ children. It is not necessary that you become bosom friends but a cordial relationship is required to have a smooth and trouble-free relationship.
Build loving relationship with children: When dating a guy with kids it is an understood fact that kids are part and parcel of the package. To make things comfortable for yourself and the children you will have to make every effort to extend your love towards them and gain their confidence. Remember they are children and you are the adult so efforts will have to be initiated from your end. Initial setbacks should not be a cause of withdrawing efforts as that can lead to future troubles.
Split finances: Divorces don’t come cheap and if your man is paying alimony for the development of his children it becomes obvious that finances are going to be split and money is going to be tight. You will have to adjust to such small facts and then go ahead with the relationship.
Have a life: A man with kids is bound to spend time with them. If you are the ‘step-mother’ there may be occasions when you are not really part of the ‘party’ – in case of a divorced man with kids. You need to have a life of your own which is apart from the man and his children. So when there are occasions when the man is spending time with his children you do not need to feel lost and lonely.
Dating a guy with kids is not an easy decision to take. There are many questions that come to the fore which have no real and concrete answer. If you are ready to take the ‘risks’ and go ahead with a not-so-normal relationship then do so with complete confidence and make sure to win over the confidence of the children. Many-a-times, especially with loving fathers, the children may be the decision makers in such situations.
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