Gone are the days when adopted children were looked upon with raised eyebrows. Adoption is now a universally accepted fact.
Parents from many countries are actively adopting because they have started understanding the value of giving a child a second chance.
"Children are God's blessing", is an irrefutable statement. Irrespective of whether you have given birth to a child or you are adopting one, you are truly blessed!
Perhaps you have just adopted a child or may be you want to adopt a child soon. You want to know what mistakes you should avoid, so that your child is well adjusted and has a happy childhood.
There are over a 100 mistakes that parents can make while raising both a biological and adopted child.
However, parents who adopt children need to be extra careful, as adopted children tend to be sensitive at first.
While some of the mistakes that are commonly made by adoptive families can be easily brushed away, other mistakes can be forgotten but not forgiven by the child.
Listed below are 5 such mistakes that should never be made while raising a child who is biologically not linked to you, do have a look.
Using Foul Words Around Your Child: If you have recently adopted a child, then chances are that you are used to the freedom of using certain 4-letter words. Making a conscious habit of avoiding such words and even people who use such words is a good first step. Ensuring that you replace such words for harmless 4-letter words is an alternative. Oh Fish, would be more acceptable, but ensure that you can explain why you are using that word. Children are curious, and your child might just end up in wondering why his/her parent is suddenly remembering a fish!
Explaining The Family Tree Of Your Adopted Child: No one other than you and your immediate family needs to know, where your child came from. Explaining the adoption formalities in-depth with people who are not directly concerned can also work to your disadvantage. Keep your circle close; and as far as anyone goes, the child you have adopted is yours!
Negative Comments About Your Child's History: In order to feel secure and show the world that they have done a good task, many parents tend to speak ill about the family of their adopted child. This is not recommended, as this gives the child an inferiority complex. Moreover, the child may just mimic what you have said at school, on the playground, or when he/she meets acquaintances.
Using The Word "Adopted" While Introducing Your Child: If you do not introduce your biological child as, "Meet Shreyas, my biological child", then neither should you introduce your adopted child as, "Meet Karan, my adopted child." As far as you and the world are concerned, the child is yours, you are his/her guardian, and it is your duty to protect the child from statements such as these.
Making Your Family Sound Perfect: No family is perfect, but we all aim to be perfect. Instead of portraying your family as perfect, work on improving the bond between various family members. Portraying your family as perfect, when you actually aren't, can give your adopted child some serious self-esteem issues. Questions such as, "Am I not good enough that my dad needs to lie", will be raised in your child's mind.